Even much-needed lulls can be a little unnerving

I've been in a weird place the past week or so. December was very chaotic for me (two trips to Illinois in one month was a bit much), and after the added excitement of a big family Christmas, coming home to the quiet of my home in Florida was a little jarring. It was suddenly quiet and empty.

Don't get me wrong--I'm very glad for the chance to sort of recharge after our trip to Illinois. I like this time of year because it's quiet and reflective and not busy until Easter approaches. So I like that aside from school drop-off and pick-up, there's nowhere we have to be and nothing we have to do. We spend quiet evenings with games and toys and books instead of in and out of the car.

But I'm still settling in after December. I still feel like there's more I should be doing or something I'm forgetting. This week I've been checking my calendar far too frequently because I'm just positive I've forgotten some appointment or something.

I haven't. This really is just a quiet week at home.

It takes time to get back into a routine after a holiday, and this time it's taking me a bit longer than I expected. So I think I'll make another cup of tea and curl up with a book on the sofa before Puck goes to school this afternoon.

NaNoWriMo Pep Talk #6: the Last Days

We're in the final days of NaNoWriMo.

Can you believe the month is nearly over already? It seems that just last week I was getting excited about my idea, doing a lot of planning and research, and watching the calendar to in anticipation of when I could start writing.

And now, here we are, at the end of the month, and instead I'm reflecting on the experience, thinking about the story I have (and haven't) written, and deciding where my fiction-writing is going to go beginning on December 1.

However, where I am is not necessarily where you are. Because I have a work deadline tomorrow, I know I'm not going to finish NaNo. That's okay with me. I entered into it knowing I wouldn't. I just wanted to know that I tried, and that I could get back into fiction-writing a bit.

So don't let the fact that there are only two and a half days of writing left deter you from scribbling away. Yes, time is short, but you could still finish!

It's these last days that can be the most inspiring for WriMos. You could be writing away, and have your muse whisper something in your ear (or slap your hands or what-have-you) that sets your fingers flying. You could have a breakthrough with your main character or plot or setting that makes your word count explode.

So keep writing. You could be surprised at how well the next two days goes for you. Don't count yourself out yet because it's not over until the calendar says December first.

Keep writing, and good luck!

Lenten Reflection and The Artist's Way

We're coming to the end of the Lenten season.  (Next week begins Holy Week!)

Lent is a time to really look at your life.  When you give something up, your intention should be to give something up (or add something, as I did) in order to strengthen your faith life and be a better person.  And that's what I've been doing.

Shortly before Lent, I started The Artist's Way.  It's a tool for creative people to become "unblocked," and shows creative people how important spirituality (not specifically Christianity) is to the creative life.  When I started it, I didn't really know what to expect.  I didn't think I was blocked.  I thought I had a strong faith/spirituality.

As the weeks progressed, though, I learned that I was blocked.  And I learned that, while my faith was good, it could've been quite a bit better.  I trusted the process and kept going.

As the weeks went on, my creativity was opened up.  I learned more about myself as a writer.  I found my niche.  My writing life has blossomed.  I learned more about myself as a woman of faith.  I grew stronger in my faith, which changed how I lived my life (in a good way).

This has been a good Lent for me.  I feel good about my life and where it's headed.

Dana Hunter Reporting for Duty

While my heart-sister NP is on maternity leave, giving my gorgeous first nephew a proper start on life, I'll be taking time away from the world o' pollyticks and general inanity to post a few thoughts on writing. Regular drinkers of the Coffee-Stained Writer shall also have the opportunity to sample other fine brews. This coffee house never closes, my esteemed fellow scribblers!

In this post, I'll be taking the coward's way out and talk about how I've spent the summer not writing. This may come as some surprise to the poor regulars at my cantina, who are subjected to several posts per day. So let me qualify that: I've spent the summer not writing fiction. I've not even read any fiction. Which is a rather strange thing, considering my central ambition is to become a wildly-successful fiction author.

I can 'splain. Or at least sum up.

There comes a time in many authors' careers when they realize they don't know jack diddly about anything at all. Oh, they know how to turn a phrase, sometimes well enough to give it motion sickness. They know about plot, character, theme, setting, and all those other things Writer's Digest books assure them are so vital to good fiction. They can tell stories that don't leave friends and family members forcing themselves to maintain a pasty grin whilst assuring the anxious author that no, really, it wasn't that bad. And for some, that's enough. They can tell ripping good tales that people enjoy, they get the job done, and everybody goes away happy.

Some writers, on the other hand, are bloody perfectionists. Versimilitude of reality isn't enough. A thrilling tale is only part of the story. We've got to know everything about - well, everything.

Which is why I've spent the summer running all over the Seattle area and most of Arizona poking my nose into various and sundry, absorbing the differences between desert and ocean, small town and large, and playing in the dirt (where available).

It's why I've read nothing but science tomes for months. Biology, evolution, physics, geology, plate tectonics, sociology - everything I could get my hands on. Anything that will help me understand in appreciable depth how worlds work.

It's why I've forced myself to do a ton of things I've never done before, like walk on the rim of a meteor crater and take a ferry ride, paying intimate attention to every single detail.

And it's why I've refused to allow myself to write so much as a paragraph.

This enforced absence is an experiment of sorts. And it's possible it will fail. My worldbuilding may be no better for all that. My stories might have worked just as well without all this effort.

But it's not wasted time. The more you know about the world, the more beauty you find in it. Discovery is a delight. And I'll be returning to fiction a little less miserably ignorant than when I started out.

Most importantly: you'll all get a chance to laugh while I struggle to knock the rust off my poor disused wordcraft. I promise it'll be amusing.

Have any of you ever taken a hiatus? Did you come back refreshed or regretful?

Lenten Reflection

I've been doing Lenten reflections on Friday, but this weekend has been a bit strange, so I'm a bitteen behind in my blogging.  So I'm posting today instead.

This week went by so quickly!  It's already mid-March, and Easter will be here before we know it!

This week has been full of prayer.  My husband had a job interview, so he and I have been praying (both together and separately) about it.  We still haven't heard, so please keep us in your thoughts and prayers.

To be honest, his job interview has been a great boost to my faith.  With everything that's been going on in our lives in the past year or so, I'm thankful that we're getting to where we are.  But it's not just that.  I was raised in a Protestant home, and in my life, "Let go and let God" was a frequent mantra.  So I have always been of the mind that, at some point, we have to let go of whatever we're trying to fix and let the Lord handle it in His Own Time.  And then, things happen.

Matthew 19:26 (NASB) says, "...Jesus said to them, 'With people this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.'"

This week, that's been very helpful to me.  Several months ago (even a few weeks ago), Hubby felt that he could never get a good job.  But since he's been putting his faith in the Lord and letting things happen, everything's coming together.

Romans 8:28, 31 (NASB) says, "And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose.  What then shall we say to these things?  If God is for us, who is against us?"

This is a passage that's been coming to mind a lot lately, as well.  Everything has been falling into place, and it's because the Lord has a plan.  And as long as the Lord is on our side, what does it matter if others are against us?

This has been an inspiring week for me.  Things are all coming together for Hubby and me, and it's really amazing to see.  It's almost surreal the way things fall into place when it's time for them to.  And it's been a great inspiration to me, reminding me that the Lord is at work in our lives, putting things together the way they belong.

There were so many times I told Hubby, "It'll be okay.  Just pray.  It'll be okay."  And now I feel like he can see why I've been saying that all along.

Lenten Reflection

I have to admit that this week, Lent has not gone as I expected it would.  I had high hopes for this Lenten season, but being pregnant has sort of changed things around a bit.  I was frustrated for a few days about it (I felt a bit like a failure), but after praying about it and reading more on Lent, I've adjusted my expectations of myself so things are going much better.

I'm a member of a Catholic forum, and there's been lots of conversation going on among women who are pregnant right now, and how it's affecting their Lenten experience.  One woman, for example, was told by her doctor not to change her diet at all during Lent, including abstaining from meat on Fridays.  Another woman has been ill and exhausted, so she hasn't been able to tend to her daily routine, let alone the "extras" of Lent.  However, we're all finding other ways to make this season special.

I have to keep reminding myself that Lent is a spiritual time more than a physical time.  Yes, people are asked to abstain from meat on Fridays and "give something up" for the season, but it's meant to remind us of the sacrifice Christ made for us.  It's meant to bring us closer to our faith as we prepare for Easter.

So if I can't get up as early as I'd like in order to pray, I can set aside time during the day to pray.  And if I need to eat meat to keep me from feeling ill, I can find something else to give up that day instead.

Ultimately, I have to take care of myself and the baby, and the Lord knows that.

Coffee-Stained Nightstand: a Reflection

I finished reading The Heroines by Eileen Favorite.  

Being a Fforde Ffan, I had high expectations of a novel in which heroines from classic literature show up at an Illinois bed and breakfast for rest, relaxation, and a break from the drama of their inky lives.

I will tell you this book was not what I expected.  The drama in the story had more to do with the narrator, daughter of the innkeeper, than the heorines that came to stay, but because of what happens in the story--a thirteen-year-old daughter feels slighted by her mother in favor of the Heroines--there are some good literary moments.

I really, actually, enjoyed the structure of the story.  The chapters were laid out in the way classic literature used to be (the chapter title, and a few subtitles letting the reader know what to expect in the chapter), and the chapters went back and forth between the current plot and giving background to let the reader know why that part of the plot is significant or how a certain situation came to pass.  In effect, there were two stories going on, but it worked.

One criticism I have for the book is the way it wrapped up.  I felt the ending was sort of tacked on in an attempt to give the readers some sort of satisfaction.  I would much rather have had an open ending than the one I was provided.  It's not that I didn't like the ending, or that it didn't fit necessarily, but the way in which it was written left a lot to be desired, in my opinion.  It should have been longer, or omitted completely.

For those looking for a light, fun read about an interesting situation, this is a pretty good read.  I prefer Fforde, but it wasn't bad.

Lenten Reflection

Today is the first Friday of Lent.

I'm happy to say that I'm already spending more time in prayer than I normally would, but not where I expected I would be.  I've had some trouble sleeping, so it's been hard to get up in the morning for my prayer time, so I'm going to work harder beginning tomorrow morning.

I found a great article this morning on Tara's Modern Catholic Mom for Lent.  It's original source is Catholic Exchange, and the original link to the article is here.  You can read it on Tara's blog here.  The article is called "40 Ways to Get the Most out of Lent."  Not all of the 40 things are feasible for me this year, but I'm going to try and do as many of them as possible.  Here's the list for those of you who would like to get more out of Lent this year.  I'm copying it word for word from the original article, and the only things I've omitted is references to the author's CDs for sale.

1. Take 30 minutes to pray, ask the Holy Spirit for guidance, look over this list, and make a few practical Lenten resolutions.  Be careful.  If you try to do too much, you may not succeed in anything.  If you need to get up early or stay up late to get the 30 minutes of quiet, do it.  Turn off your phone and computer.  Don't put it off and don't allow interruptions.
2. Get up earlier than anyone else in your house and spend your first 15 minutes of the day thanking God for the gift of life and offering your day to him.
3. Get to daily Mass.
4. If you can't do Mass daily, go to Mass on Fridays in addition to Sunday and thank Him for laying his life down for you.  Maybe you can go another time or two as well.
5. Spend at least 30 minutes in Eucharistic adoration at least one time during the week.
6. Recover the Catholic tradition of making frequent visits to the Blessed Sacrament throughout the week, even if it's only for 5 minutes.
7. Get to confession at least once during Lent after making a good examination of conscience....
8. In addition to the penance assigned by the priest, fulfill the conditions necessary for a plenary indulgence.  You can learn about plenary indulgences from the official Handbook of Indulgences, Catholic Book Publishing Company (costs only about $13).
9. Make a decision to read at least some Scripture every day.
10. Even if you can't get to daily Mass, get a daily Catholic Missal or go online to get a list of the readings used each day in Mass, and read those readings daily.  During special seasons such as Lent, the Mass readings are thematically coordinated and make for a fantastic Bible study!
11. Pray the liturgy of the hours.  You can buy a one volume edition or a full four volume edition.  Or you can get it day by day online for free at www.universalis.com.  Or you can subscribe to a monthly publication called the Magnificat that provides a few things from the liturgy of the hours together with the Mass readings of the day.  The Magnificat is a great way to start learning the Liturgy of the Hours.
12. Get to know the Fathers of the Church and read selections from them along with Scripture.  Short selections from the Fathers writing on Lenten themes can be downloaded for free from the Lenten library of our website, www.crossroadsinitiative.com.
13. Make the Stations of the Cross each Friday either with a group or by yourself.  If you have kids, bring them.
14. Pray the Sorrowful Mysteries of the Rosary often during Lent, especially on Friday and Wednesday.  The glorious mysteries are especially appropriate on Sundays.  Joyful and Luminous mysteries are great on other days.
15. Purchase the Scriptural Rosary, which supplies you with a scripture verse to recite between each Hail Mary.  This makes it easier to meditate on the mysteries....
16. If you've never done a family rosary, begin doing it.  If starting with once a week, try Friday or Sunday.  If it's tough to start with a full five decades, try starting with one.  Use the Scriptural Rosary and have a different person read each of the Scriptures between the Hail Marys.  This gets everyone involved.
17. Make it a habit to stop at least five times a day, raise your heart and mind to God, and say a short prayer such as "Jesus, I love you," or "Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy on me, a sinner," or "Lord, I offer it up for you."
18. Pray each day for the intentions and health of the Holy Father.
19. Pray each day for your bishop and all the bishops of the Catholic Church.
20. Pray for your priests and deacons and for all priests and deacons.
21. Pray for the millions of Christians suffering under persecution in various Muslim and Communist countries around the world such as the Sudan, Pakistan, Indonesia, China, Viet Nam, and North Korea.
22. Pray for Christian unity, that there would be one flock and one shepherd.
23. Pray for the evangelization of all those who have not yet heard and accepted the Good News about Jesus.
24. Pray for your enemies.  In fact, think of the person who has most hurt you or most annoys you and spend several minutes each day thanking God for that person and asking God to bless him or her.
25. Pray for an end to abortion on demand in the United States.  Pray for pregnant women contemplating abortion.
26. Pray for a just peace in Iraq, Afghanistan, the Holy Land and elsewhere.  Pray for military personnel and others in harm's way.
27. Pray for an end to capital punishment.  Pray for those on death row, and for the families of murder victims.
28. Find a form of fasting that is appropriate for you, given your age, state of health, and state of life.  Some fast on bread and water on Wednesdays and Fridays.  Some fast from sweets or alcohol throughout Lent.  Some fast on one or more days per week from breakfast all the way to dinner, spending lunch hour in prayer or at noon Mass.  Some cut out all snacks between meals.  The money saved from not buying various things should be given to an apostolate or ministry serving the physically or spiritually poor.
29. Prayer is like breathing--you have to do it continually.  But sometimes you need to pause and take a very deep breath.  That's what a retreat is.  Plan a retreat this Lent.  It could be simply a half day, out in nature, or in a Church.  Or it could be a full day.  Or an overnight.  You can certainly read lots of things during your retreat or listen to lots of talks.  But try sticking to Scripture, the liturgy, and quiet as much as you can.  During or at the end of the retreat, write down what the Holy Spirit seems to be saying to you.
30. Find a written biography of a Saint that particularly appeals to you, and read it during Lent.
31. Instead of secular videos for weekend entertainment, try some videos that will enrich your spiritual life.  Suggestions: Jesus of Nazareth, by Franco Zeffirelli, The Scarlet and the Black, the Assisi Underground (if you can't find these for rent at the local video store, they are all available from Ignatius Press)
32. While driving, turn off the secular radio for awhile and use commute time to listen to some teaching on audiocassette or CD.  Som great resources can be purchased through www.dritaly.com or from other Catholic apostolates and publishers that you find on our links pages.
33. Find a local homeless shelter, soup kitchen, or crisis pregnancy center, and volunteer some time there throughout Lent.  Serve the people there with the understanding that in so doing, you are serving Jesus.  Try to see Jesus in each person there.
34. Visit someone at a nursing home or in the hospital or sick at home.  Again, love Jesus in and through the suffering person.
35. Is there a widow or divorced person living in your neighborhood?  If so, invite that person to your home for dinner, coffee, etc.
36. Go and see Mel Gibson's movie The Passion of the Christ during Lent, if you feel you can handle the violence.  Get a copy of The Guide to the Passion to help you get the most out of the movie.
37. Bring someone to The Passion of the Christ, especially someone whose faith is rather nominal, or who does not practice their faith, or who does not profess Christian faith at all.  Give them a copy of The Guide to the Passion.
38. Spend some focused time with your spouse, strengthening your marriage.  Start praying together, or make praying together a more frequent occurrence.
39. Spend some focused time together with each of your children.  Listen.  Pray.  Maybe even have fun.
40. When Easter comes, don't drop the new practice you've begun during Lent!  Make a permanent feature of a deeper Christian life!

Ash Wednesday

Today, Ash Wednesday, marks the first day of the Lenten season leading up to Easter.

Lent is a serious time in the Liturgical Calendar.  It's a time of penance, reflection/prayer, and fasting as Catholics (as well as some Protestant denominations) prepare their hearts to celebrate Christ's death and resurrection.  And as part of penance, Catholics are instructed to "give something up" for Lent, to (in a small way) remind themselves of the sacrifice Christ made when He died for our sins.

However, I think a large part of Lent, and one that's often overlooked, is prayer and reflection.  This is a time for self-examination, for taking a long, hard look at who we are, decisions we make, priorities in our lives.  Our Lenten sacrifice is meant to make us stronger, more faithful people, and in order to do that, we have to be honest about who we are to begin with.

I decided this year that I'm "giving up" wasting time for Lent.  I realized I spend a lot of time doing nothing.  So for this Lenten season, every time I find myself without a work or personal task to do instead of playing a game online or turning on a random television show, I'm going to spend time in prayer and study.  It will be a much better use of my time, and will hopefully be a habit that continues even after Easter.

Whether you observe Lent or not, whether you celebrate Easter or not, I urge you to spend some time in reflection.  What are your priorities?  What do you want to change in yourself?  What New Year's Resolutions have you kept?

Giving is Sharing What You Don't Have

There are many people I know who work very hard every day without complaint, pushing themselves as far as they can go to get done what they need to get done. And I admire that. I am often amazed by the things people are willing to do and the sacrifices people are willing to make for the people they love.

Parents who go without so their children will have what they need (and want).

Siblings who open their homes when a brother or sister needs a place to stay until they get back on their feet.

Friends who send what little extra money they have to friends who don't have enough.

There are people who find ways to give even when they barely have enough for themselves. They are the people who can always be counted on to help you move or babysit your kids or pick up your mail while you're on vacation. They do it with smiles, never grudgingly, and don't expect anything in return, even if their schedules are full of work and family obligations with no time to relax.

I do what I can for others, and I try to do it without complaint. I'm not always successful at that second part, but I'm working on it. I see people give when they have almost nothing themselves, and they keep nothing for themselves, so why can't I give when the Lord has blessed me?

What do you do to share your blessings?

Weekly Reflection: the Peacefulness of Prayer

Last week was an emotionally eventful week for my personal life.

My sister, whose baby is due any day now, had a doctor's appointment last week and was put on bed rest due to high blood pressure. She has another appointment early this week to check in and see how she's doing.

One of my best friends had a scary doctor's appointment last week to check out a lump she found. She was nervous about it, understandably. Thankfully, it was benign.

And while all this was going on, I had a couple of writing projects due at the end of the week. One of the projects just didn't feel right to me, and though I worked on it and tweaked it and eventually sent it in (on deadline), I still feel that something was off about it.

All week I felt as though I was going from one minor crisis to another (some bigger than others, of course). By the end of the week, I was emotionally drained.

Friday evening, Hubby and I went to Mass with the in-laws for the Feast of the Assumption. It was a welcome break from the chaos of the week, and gave me an opportunity to spend time in worship and prayer away from the distractions of the office and everyday life.

During Mass I prayed (as I always do) in the quiet moment after the homily, and immediately began to feel more at peace, more emotionally balanced, and relaxed. In that moment, I was able to concentrate on my prayer and my personal, spiritual life, and the frustrations and anxieties of the week seemed to slip away and I could breathe again.

Today's society is full of attention-getting devices. TV, radio, and the Internet fill our senses with sounds and images and help us keep our lives full of stimulation and noise. That's fine, but there comes a point when I just need quiet, and in those quiet moments, I find myself in prayer. And with that prayer comes peace.

When I pray, I'm able to turn my thoughts inward and step away from the outside distractions of life. I think it's that introspection that allows me to recharge myself and get ready for another week of distractions and chaos. The peace I feel in prayer at Mass steadies me to face whatever trials I meet head-on and without fear or doubt, and to keep on keeping on.